A Companion Who Wouldn’t Get Feelings Involved

Songwriting is acceptable over sharing with strangers. I wouldn’t walk up to a new face and say, “Hey, I’m Jacob. I’m horribly depressed. The sight of happy people makes me furious. And, oh, I’m on drugs right now and I’m a little worried of what it’s doing to my body, but also, if something goes down, does it really matter? I mean, I fell down the stairs earlier, I felt something give out, but hey, I’m here now. What’s your name, again?” But I did find a pretty way to say that & I will sing it to anyone who’ll listen.

Before we move forward, 2 things, 1, none of that stuff is true anymore, 2, if you found that uncomfortable, don’t worry, we’ll lighten up from here on out.

Blanket statement: people need an outlet to over share. Whether it’s therapy, family, or friends, it’s needed. It’s not always comfortable & sometimes it’s a straight up burden, but what happens when a person doesn’t have a confidant?

They word vomit on a gas station clerk.

For as long as I could remember I’d wanted to work at a gas station. Growing up my folks wouldn’t let me for fear of being robbed. I thought they were crazy. We lived in a small town. Who’d rob a Casey’s General Store? Meth heads, that’s who, & they did at an astounding rate.

Let’s fast forward 10 or so years. A friend of mine managed several gas stations and needed a hand at one of the locations. This was a bucket list item. I jumped at the chance.

Early one Sunday morning, I rang up a fella’s cigarettes & Mountain Dew & wished him a good day.

He stopped in the doorway & said, “I’m a helping a friend move today.”

“Ah, sounds fun.”

The man paused before saying, “My wife’s not too happy about it.” I raised my brow. “The friend I’m helping is my ex.” I was quiet. “I really loved her.” Another moment passed. “She was the one, but she didn’t want kids, I did,” he said from the door way. “I should’ve married that girl.”

And with that, he was gone.

I told that story on stage once. I was met with the same looks I’m sure I gave the man as he unloaded on me. It made me glad my over shares come with a tune, but damn if there’s not something to be said about talking without shame.

This next gas station story has to be heard to be believed (though if you’d like a PDF just ask!). The moment this over share started, I committed every word to digital memory. I wasn’t sure why, but like a fleeting melody, I needed to remember this.

This is a true story of a life unlike mine.

So, why did I share that? 1. It’s pretty entertaining. 2. It’s really hard to know what other people are going through. If this person was willing to share this with me, what are they keeping to themselves? It’s a little reminder to be kind, ‘cause people are going through some heavy stuff that’s not always apparent.